Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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