I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
She's just so happy...and so naked.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
