Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
