i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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