i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
