I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
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