If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
