ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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