ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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