are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
