I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
