So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
