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• (410): View more from Maryland

  In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar

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• (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING

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• (901): View more from Tennessee

  Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.

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• (816): View more from Missouri

  Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?

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