you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
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