Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
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