how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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