i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize