um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize