my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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