I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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