Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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