a queef is a wish your heart makes.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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