hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
