farters have to be the big spoon...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.