i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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