I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
babies were throwing up all over the place
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
