dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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