I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
