Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Randomize
