I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
