it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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