We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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