You're so nebulous sometimes
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
