If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
When are your genitals available?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
