Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
