You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize