I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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