doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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