I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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