I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
