she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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