That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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