oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
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