your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
