Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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