these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
it hurts more in the daytime
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
