Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night