people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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