she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
