Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
